THE MARRIAGE CEREMONY:
1. Engagement or Mangni: Does not qualify the future spouses to go out together, even if the parents consent. Man and woman become permissible for each other only after the performance of Nikah.
2. Dowry: The unislamic system of demanding and accepting dowry must be avoided at all costs. Shariah does not make any expense incumbent on the bride/bride's parents. Even the marriage expenses, it is recommended to be borne by the bridegroom. However, the bride can bring whatever she wants of her free will, and it will always belong to her.
3. Other Unislamic Customs: Many other unislamic customs have crept into the marriage ceremony of some Muslims. These customs are either borrowed from non-Muslim cultures or continue because they are established in past generations. One must avoid them if they are against the Shariah, even if some people are displeased. Other customs like the breaking of coconut etc. also do not feature among the Islamic rituals. All actions, customs etc., which show disrespect to Islam or weaken the importance of Islam, have to be avoided.
4. Haraam Acts: Some of the rituals in marriage ceremonies are absolutely Haraam like the playing of music. It is also Haraam for ladies to go for mixed gatherings without proper Hijab. Such things invite divine wrath and take away the blessings of this auspicious occasion. In the Islamic Law, marriage is an Aqd, a contract. The components of this contract are as follows:
A. Proposal: In Islam the process of proposal by a man to a woman for her hand in marriage, or for that matter, to her family, is encouraged. Islam considers this natural, and recommends it as an act of respectability and dignity for women.
B. Mahr: And the intending husband is asked to offer a Mahr to the bride. Holy Quran says, And give women their Mahr as a free gift, but if they of themselves be pleased to give up to you a portion of it, then eat it with enjoyment and with wholesome result. (Surah Nisa 4:4)
The following points are worthy of consideration:
a) Mahr must be agreed upon by the marrying partners themselves, not by parents.
b) Mahr is her right, to which her husband remains indebted.
c) It is a free gift and not her price.
The Mahr may be cash, kind or non-material (like training or teaching something). It can be paid up front or can be in form of promise to pay upon demands decided prior to the solemnization of marriage. Moajjal (immediate), Muwajjal and Indat-talab (on demand). However, it is much recommended to pay it before or at the time of Nikah itself.
C. The Nikah Ceremony: According to Shariah, the wife-to-be says, 'An Kah'tu nafsaka a'lal mah'ril ma'loom'. ("I have given away myself in Nikah to you, on the agreed Mahr.")
Immediately, the man (bridegroom) says, 'Qabiltun Nikaha'. ("I have accepted the Nikah.")
With these pronouncements, they become husband and wife.
If the marrying partners are not able to recite the formula in Arabic, one or two persons or priests are appointed and authorized to officiate. One who represents the bride would first seek her explicit consent to officiate on her behalf, and so would the other who acts on behalf of the groom. Naturally, there would be a slight variation in the pronouncements, because the persons reciting them are appointees. A person who represents the bride would initiate by saying, "Ankah'tu muwakkilati muwakkilaka a'lal mah'ril ma'loom." ("I give away in Nikah the woman who has thus appointed and authorized me, to the man who has authorized you, on an agreed Mahr.")
The groom's representative would respond, "Qabiltunnikaaha limuwakkili a'lal mah'ril ma'loom." ("I accept the Nikah on behalf of the one who has appointed me, on the agreed Mahr.")
It is mustahab to recite a brief discourse or Khutba before the Nikah formula is enunciated. In this Khutba, Allah is praised for His Wisdom in regulating the lawful process of procreation, and then the traditions from Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) are also recited.
D. Time of Marriage Ceremony: Though basically marriage is allowed at all times, there are some days on which marriage is not recommended; some of these are based on ahadith and some on cultural, historical reasons.
Generally, we can categorize these days into three: (a) There are some ahadith which say that it is makruh (not recommended) to have a marriage ceremony on the days when the moon is in the constellation of Scorpio (this is known as al-qamar fil aqrab or qamar dar aqrab), during the last two or three days of the lunar months, and on Wednesdays. (b) There are certain days of the Islamic calendar, which have become associated with the early events of the Islamic history; for example, the 10th of Muharram is the day of mourning for the massacre at Karbala or the day of Holy Prophet Muhammad's (s.a.w.) death in Safar, etc. Since such days are commemorated by the Muslims as days of mourning, it is socially and, to some extent, religiously not recommended to have a marriage ceremony on such days.
Shia Ithna Ashari (Twelver Shias), especially in India and Pakistan, rarely perform marriage ceremony between the 1st of Muharram and the 8th of Rabi al-Awwal as this period includes the mourning days of Muharram culminating in the martyrdom of Imam Askari (a.s.). The 9th Rabi al-Awwal is celebrated as Eid-e-Zahra.
If there is a need, however, Nikah, can be performed at any time.
E. Permission of the Bride-to-be/Father: The girl's consent is necessary and has to be taken by her representative, directly.
In case of a virgin/spinster the father's or the grandfather's permission is also necessary. However if the permission is unreasonably withheld under some conditions or the girl has no father/paternal grandfather it is not necessary. However, a woman who is not a virgin, does not require any permission in case of remarriage.
F. Valima (Dinner): Valima is highly recommended on the groom. The relatives, neighbors and friends must be invited for Valima. However, lavish spending is not advisable especially when the same money can be used effectively by the couple.
Monday, 14 March 2011
SELECTION OF SPOUSE:
SELECTION OF SPOUSE:
Now that we have seen how much importance Islam has accorded to marriage and marital life you would perhaps ask, "How do we select a spouse? What are the guidelines provided by Islam in this regard? Do we look for some particular characteristics or just try to get the best from the worldly point of view?"
Are Pre-Marital contacts Necessary?
Ali Akber Mazaheri writes: "The notion that a man and a woman must 'know' each other before they decide to marry, so that they may then be able to live happily together is an illusion. Had there been any element of truth and validity in this, the divorce and separation rates in societies, which practice it, would not have shown a steady rise. Similarly, the marriages which take place without such pre-marital contacts would not have been known to last happily."
The Shariah permits the intended spouses to see each other for the purpose of selection and also permits asking and giving opinions if asked (without it being considered as Gheebat under certain conditions). We should never resort to deceive the opposite party or conceal a defect during the selection process. Such things can have serious ramifications if exposed after marriage.
The school of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) has not left us to follow our whims and fancies. We have been taught the best method of selecting a suitable spouse. The most important criterion is piety or religiousness.
A. Religiousness: The author of Youth and Spouse Selection says, "The person who does not have religion, does not have anything."
When a man came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) to seek guidance for selecting a spouse. He (s.a.w.) said, "It is binding upon you to have a religious spouse."
Knowing the human weakness for beauty and wealth, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) has forewarned, "A man who marries a woman for the sake of her wealth, Allah leaves him in his own condition, and one who marries her (only) for her beauty, will find in her (things) which he dislikes (unpleasing manners) and Allah will gather up all these things for one who marries her for the sake of her faith (religiousness)."
B. Good nature: Imam Reza (a.s.) wrote in reply to a person who had asked him if it was advisable to marry his daughter to a person known for his ill nature, "If he is ill-natured (bad tempered), don't marry your daughter to him." The same will apply where the bride-to-be lacks a good nature. Such a woman, though she may be beautiful and rich, would make the life of her husband miserable. She can never be patient in the difficulties that arise in married life.
C. Compatibility: Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) gave no recognition to class distinction, but in marriage, he stressed upon compatibility. The marrying partners must be Kufw of each other, so that there are no unnecessary misgivings later. It is better for a religious woman who is committed to laws and principles to marry a man like herself.
A man questioned Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), "Whom must we marry?"
He replied, "The suitable (matches)."
"Who are the suitable matches?"
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) responded, "Some of the faithful are match for others."
Imam Jafar as-Sadiq (a.s.) said, "An intelligent and wise woman must not be matched except with a sage and wise man."
D. Decent Family: The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) has given great emphasis on taking into consideration a good family background when we intend to marry.
He said, "Marry in the lap of a decent family, since the semen and the genes have effect."
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) also said, "Look very carefully and minutely as to where you are placing your child because genes and hereditary qualities are transferred in a concealed and unintentional way and have their effect."
E. Reason: The Commander of the Faithful, Imam Ali (a.s.) strongly forbade marrying a foolish and insane person. "Avoid marrying a stupid woman, since her company is a woe (distress) and her children too get wasted."
F. Physical and Mental Health: Though religiousness and piety are most important, it does not mean that we totally disregard the physical appearance and beauty of the prospective spouse.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) says, "When one intends to marry a woman, he should ask about her hair, just as he asks about her face (beauty), since the hair is one of the two beauties (of women)."
G. Whom can you marry? "Islamic law has placed certain restrictions on the choice of your spouse depending upon blood relationships and religious affiliations." Maulana Sayyid Muhammad Rizvi has summarized these laws in a beautiful way:
(a) Restrictions based on Relationship
There are certain blood relations, which are considered Haraam for you as far as marriage is concerned. (As a general rule, anyone who is your Mahram is forbidden to you for marriage.) The list of such relatives is given in the Holy Qur'an as follows:
For Man: mother, daughter, paternal aunt, maternal aunt, niece, foster-mother, foster-sister, mother-in-law, stepdaughter, daughter-in-law, all married women, sister-in-law (as a 2nd wife) (See Holy Qur'an, ch. 4, verse 23-24)
For Woman: father, son, paternal uncle, maternal uncle, nephew, foster-mother's husband, foster-brother, father-in-law, stepson, son-in-law.
(b) Restrictions based on Religion
A Shi'ah Muslim man can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim woman and a non-Shi'ah Muslim woman. However, if there is danger of being misled, then it is Haraam.
He can also marry a Jewish or Christian woman in mut'a only. But he cannot marry a woman of any other faith.
A Shi'ah Muslim woman can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim man or a non-Shi'ah Muslim man, although it is better not to do so; and if there is danger of being misled, then it is Haraam. But she cannot marry a non-Muslim man.
(c) Cousin Marriages
Though Shariah does not forbid marriage between first cousins, but there are opinions advocating against them mainly due to a probable risk of the offspring inheriting genetic defects/diseases.
Now that we have seen how much importance Islam has accorded to marriage and marital life you would perhaps ask, "How do we select a spouse? What are the guidelines provided by Islam in this regard? Do we look for some particular characteristics or just try to get the best from the worldly point of view?"
Are Pre-Marital contacts Necessary?
Ali Akber Mazaheri writes: "The notion that a man and a woman must 'know' each other before they decide to marry, so that they may then be able to live happily together is an illusion. Had there been any element of truth and validity in this, the divorce and separation rates in societies, which practice it, would not have shown a steady rise. Similarly, the marriages which take place without such pre-marital contacts would not have been known to last happily."
The Shariah permits the intended spouses to see each other for the purpose of selection and also permits asking and giving opinions if asked (without it being considered as Gheebat under certain conditions). We should never resort to deceive the opposite party or conceal a defect during the selection process. Such things can have serious ramifications if exposed after marriage.
The school of Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) has not left us to follow our whims and fancies. We have been taught the best method of selecting a suitable spouse. The most important criterion is piety or religiousness.
A. Religiousness: The author of Youth and Spouse Selection says, "The person who does not have religion, does not have anything."
When a man came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) to seek guidance for selecting a spouse. He (s.a.w.) said, "It is binding upon you to have a religious spouse."
Knowing the human weakness for beauty and wealth, the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) has forewarned, "A man who marries a woman for the sake of her wealth, Allah leaves him in his own condition, and one who marries her (only) for her beauty, will find in her (things) which he dislikes (unpleasing manners) and Allah will gather up all these things for one who marries her for the sake of her faith (religiousness)."
B. Good nature: Imam Reza (a.s.) wrote in reply to a person who had asked him if it was advisable to marry his daughter to a person known for his ill nature, "If he is ill-natured (bad tempered), don't marry your daughter to him." The same will apply where the bride-to-be lacks a good nature. Such a woman, though she may be beautiful and rich, would make the life of her husband miserable. She can never be patient in the difficulties that arise in married life.
C. Compatibility: Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) gave no recognition to class distinction, but in marriage, he stressed upon compatibility. The marrying partners must be Kufw of each other, so that there are no unnecessary misgivings later. It is better for a religious woman who is committed to laws and principles to marry a man like herself.
A man questioned Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), "Whom must we marry?"
He replied, "The suitable (matches)."
"Who are the suitable matches?"
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) responded, "Some of the faithful are match for others."
Imam Jafar as-Sadiq (a.s.) said, "An intelligent and wise woman must not be matched except with a sage and wise man."
D. Decent Family: The Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.) has given great emphasis on taking into consideration a good family background when we intend to marry.
He said, "Marry in the lap of a decent family, since the semen and the genes have effect."
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) also said, "Look very carefully and minutely as to where you are placing your child because genes and hereditary qualities are transferred in a concealed and unintentional way and have their effect."
E. Reason: The Commander of the Faithful, Imam Ali (a.s.) strongly forbade marrying a foolish and insane person. "Avoid marrying a stupid woman, since her company is a woe (distress) and her children too get wasted."
F. Physical and Mental Health: Though religiousness and piety are most important, it does not mean that we totally disregard the physical appearance and beauty of the prospective spouse.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) says, "When one intends to marry a woman, he should ask about her hair, just as he asks about her face (beauty), since the hair is one of the two beauties (of women)."
G. Whom can you marry? "Islamic law has placed certain restrictions on the choice of your spouse depending upon blood relationships and religious affiliations." Maulana Sayyid Muhammad Rizvi has summarized these laws in a beautiful way:
(a) Restrictions based on Relationship
There are certain blood relations, which are considered Haraam for you as far as marriage is concerned. (As a general rule, anyone who is your Mahram is forbidden to you for marriage.) The list of such relatives is given in the Holy Qur'an as follows:
For Man: mother, daughter, paternal aunt, maternal aunt, niece, foster-mother, foster-sister, mother-in-law, stepdaughter, daughter-in-law, all married women, sister-in-law (as a 2nd wife) (See Holy Qur'an, ch. 4, verse 23-24)
For Woman: father, son, paternal uncle, maternal uncle, nephew, foster-mother's husband, foster-brother, father-in-law, stepson, son-in-law.
(b) Restrictions based on Religion
A Shi'ah Muslim man can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim woman and a non-Shi'ah Muslim woman. However, if there is danger of being misled, then it is Haraam.
He can also marry a Jewish or Christian woman in mut'a only. But he cannot marry a woman of any other faith.
A Shi'ah Muslim woman can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim man or a non-Shi'ah Muslim man, although it is better not to do so; and if there is danger of being misled, then it is Haraam. But she cannot marry a non-Muslim man.
(c) Cousin Marriages
Though Shariah does not forbid marriage between first cousins, but there are opinions advocating against them mainly due to a probable risk of the offspring inheriting genetic defects/diseases.
WHEN MUST WE MARRY?
WHEN MUST WE MARRY?
The proper time and age of marrying is when the individual reaches sexual as well as mental maturity. Mental maturity may mean the capability of establishing a cordial family life and the ability to fulfill rights of family members.
The need of a spouse and family is a natural and instinctive need, which Allah (SWT) through His Wisdom has placed in human beings and is awakened at its particular time and season, and makes its demand. If it is answered on time and its requirement fulfilled, it traverses its natural course and makes the person perfect. If it is delayed or answered in an incorrect and unnatural mode, it deviates from its natural course, and in surges and rebels, and not only becomes corrupt itself, but also corrupts the man.
Who is eligible to marry?
For man to become eligible for taking a woman's hand in marriage, Islam has several recommendations. According to Islamic laws, when a boy attains the age of fifteen, or becomes sexually potent, he is Baligh, and has attained puberty. But this is not enough for entering into a contract of marriage (Nikaah).
Apart from the laws related to puberty, there is a concept of Rushd which can be translated as 'capability of a sensible conduct' or maturity. A husband has to be Rashid and a wife Rashidah; so that the responsibilities of married life are sensibly discharged. Books of Islamic law may be referred for exact details on physical and mental maturity.
Recommendation for Early Marriage (Nikah).
Islam highly recommends an early marriage. Even those who feel they would not be able to bear the expenses of family are urged to repose faith in Allah, as He is the Giver of Sustenance (Rizq), and go for an early marriage.
The proper time and age of marrying is when the individual reaches sexual as well as mental maturity. Mental maturity may mean the capability of establishing a cordial family life and the ability to fulfill rights of family members.
The need of a spouse and family is a natural and instinctive need, which Allah (SWT) through His Wisdom has placed in human beings and is awakened at its particular time and season, and makes its demand. If it is answered on time and its requirement fulfilled, it traverses its natural course and makes the person perfect. If it is delayed or answered in an incorrect and unnatural mode, it deviates from its natural course, and in surges and rebels, and not only becomes corrupt itself, but also corrupts the man.
Who is eligible to marry?
For man to become eligible for taking a woman's hand in marriage, Islam has several recommendations. According to Islamic laws, when a boy attains the age of fifteen, or becomes sexually potent, he is Baligh, and has attained puberty. But this is not enough for entering into a contract of marriage (Nikaah).
Apart from the laws related to puberty, there is a concept of Rushd which can be translated as 'capability of a sensible conduct' or maturity. A husband has to be Rashid and a wife Rashidah; so that the responsibilities of married life are sensibly discharged. Books of Islamic law may be referred for exact details on physical and mental maturity.
Recommendation for Early Marriage (Nikah).
Islam highly recommends an early marriage. Even those who feel they would not be able to bear the expenses of family are urged to repose faith in Allah, as He is the Giver of Sustenance (Rizq), and go for an early marriage.
02. IMPORTANCE OF MARRIAGE IN ISLAM:
02. IMPORTANCE OF MARRIAGE IN ISLAM:
Holy Quran says: And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, Knowing. (Surah Nur 24:32)
The above ayat begins with the words Wa Ankehoo (And marry ...) The imperative form of the word 'nikah' implies that either it is obligatory or highly recommended. According to scholars, though marriage is a highly recommended act, it becomes obligatory when there is a chance of falling into sin.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) says, "No house has been built in Islam more beloved in the sight of Allah than through marriage."
On another occasion Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said: "The best people of my nation (Ummat) are those who get married and have chosen their wives, and the worst people of my nation are those who have kept away from marriage and are passing their lives as bachelors."
Imam Ali (a.s.) exhorts, "Marry, because marriage is the tradition of Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.)." Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) also said, "Whosoever likes to follow my tradition, then he should know that marriage is from my tradition."
A. Importance of sex in marriage.
In Islam, marriage is not restricted to a platonic relationship between husband and wife, nor is it solely for procreation. The Islamic term for marriage, "Nikah" literally means sexual intercourse. So why has Islam provided extensive rules and regulation regarding sex? This was because Islam has fully understood that sexual instincts cannot and must not be repressed. They can only be regulated for the well being of human beings in this life and for their success in the hereafter.
Sex in married life has been openly recommended in Holy Qur'an, "When they [i.e., the wives] have cleansed themselves [after menstruation], you go into them as Allah has commanded." (Surah Baqarah 2:222)
B. Fulfillment of Sexual Urge.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and the Holy Imams (a.s.) also encouraged their followers to marry and to fulfill their sexual urges in lawful ways as can be seen. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "O you young men! I recommend marriage to you."
Imam Reza (a.s.) said, "Three things are from the traditions of the messengers of God: using perfume, removing the [excessive] hair and visiting one's wife."
C. Celibacy and Monasticism is Forbidden.
Islam is totally opposed to monasticism and celibacy. Uthman bin Maz'un was a close companion of Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.). One day his wife came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and complained, "O Messenger of God! Uthman fasts during the day and stands for prayers during the night." In other words, she meant to say that her husband was avoiding sexual relations during the night as well as the day. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) was angered. He did not even wait to put on his slippers. He went to Uthman's house and found him praying. When Uthman finished his prayers and turned towards Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), he said, "O Uthman! Allah did not send me for monasticism, rather He sent me with a simple and straight [Shariah]. I fast, pray and also have intimate relations with my wife. So whosoever likes my tradition, then he should follow it; and marriage is one of my traditions."
D. Beneficial Effects of a Married Life.
Various studies prove that married people remain healthier, physically and mentally. Islam has always maintained that marriage is beneficial for us in many ways.
Islam also regards marriage as a way to acquire spiritual perfection. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "One who marries, has already guarded half of his religion, therefore he should fear Allah for the other half." How true! A person who fulfills his sexual urges lawfully would rarely be distracted in spiritual pursuits.
E. Marriage (Nikaah) enhances the value of prayers.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "Two rak 'ats (cycles) prayed by a married person are better than the night-vigil and the fast of a single person." A woman came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and said that she had tried everything to attract her husband but in vain; he does not leave his meditation to pay any attention to her. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) told her to inform her husband about the reward of sexual intercourse, which he described as follows: "When a man approaches his wife, he is guarded by two angels and [at that moment in Allah's views] he is like a warrior fighting for the cause of Allah. When he has intercourse with her, his sins fall like the leaves of the tree [in fall season]. When he performs the major ablution, he is cleansed from sins."
F. Marriage (Nikah) increases Sustenance.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) remarked, "Give spouses to your single ones, because Allah (SWT) makes their morality better (improves it) (under the shadow of marriage) and expands their sustenance and increases their generosity (human values)."
Holy Quran says: And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, Knowing. (Surah Nur 24:32)
The above ayat begins with the words Wa Ankehoo (And marry ...) The imperative form of the word 'nikah' implies that either it is obligatory or highly recommended. According to scholars, though marriage is a highly recommended act, it becomes obligatory when there is a chance of falling into sin.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) says, "No house has been built in Islam more beloved in the sight of Allah than through marriage."
On another occasion Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said: "The best people of my nation (Ummat) are those who get married and have chosen their wives, and the worst people of my nation are those who have kept away from marriage and are passing their lives as bachelors."
Imam Ali (a.s.) exhorts, "Marry, because marriage is the tradition of Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.)." Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) also said, "Whosoever likes to follow my tradition, then he should know that marriage is from my tradition."
A. Importance of sex in marriage.
In Islam, marriage is not restricted to a platonic relationship between husband and wife, nor is it solely for procreation. The Islamic term for marriage, "Nikah" literally means sexual intercourse. So why has Islam provided extensive rules and regulation regarding sex? This was because Islam has fully understood that sexual instincts cannot and must not be repressed. They can only be regulated for the well being of human beings in this life and for their success in the hereafter.
Sex in married life has been openly recommended in Holy Qur'an, "When they [i.e., the wives] have cleansed themselves [after menstruation], you go into them as Allah has commanded." (Surah Baqarah 2:222)
B. Fulfillment of Sexual Urge.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and the Holy Imams (a.s.) also encouraged their followers to marry and to fulfill their sexual urges in lawful ways as can be seen. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "O you young men! I recommend marriage to you."
Imam Reza (a.s.) said, "Three things are from the traditions of the messengers of God: using perfume, removing the [excessive] hair and visiting one's wife."
C. Celibacy and Monasticism is Forbidden.
Islam is totally opposed to monasticism and celibacy. Uthman bin Maz'un was a close companion of Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.). One day his wife came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and complained, "O Messenger of God! Uthman fasts during the day and stands for prayers during the night." In other words, she meant to say that her husband was avoiding sexual relations during the night as well as the day. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) was angered. He did not even wait to put on his slippers. He went to Uthman's house and found him praying. When Uthman finished his prayers and turned towards Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), he said, "O Uthman! Allah did not send me for monasticism, rather He sent me with a simple and straight [Shariah]. I fast, pray and also have intimate relations with my wife. So whosoever likes my tradition, then he should follow it; and marriage is one of my traditions."
D. Beneficial Effects of a Married Life.
Various studies prove that married people remain healthier, physically and mentally. Islam has always maintained that marriage is beneficial for us in many ways.
Islam also regards marriage as a way to acquire spiritual perfection. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "One who marries, has already guarded half of his religion, therefore he should fear Allah for the other half." How true! A person who fulfills his sexual urges lawfully would rarely be distracted in spiritual pursuits.
E. Marriage (Nikaah) enhances the value of prayers.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) said, "Two rak 'ats (cycles) prayed by a married person are better than the night-vigil and the fast of a single person." A woman came to Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and said that she had tried everything to attract her husband but in vain; he does not leave his meditation to pay any attention to her. Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) told her to inform her husband about the reward of sexual intercourse, which he described as follows: "When a man approaches his wife, he is guarded by two angels and [at that moment in Allah's views] he is like a warrior fighting for the cause of Allah. When he has intercourse with her, his sins fall like the leaves of the tree [in fall season]. When he performs the major ablution, he is cleansed from sins."
F. Marriage (Nikah) increases Sustenance.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) remarked, "Give spouses to your single ones, because Allah (SWT) makes their morality better (improves it) (under the shadow of marriage) and expands their sustenance and increases their generosity (human values)."
Islamic Marriage (Nikaah) Handbook for Young Muslims, Muslim Wedding and Marriage Guide
Islamic Marriage (Nikaah) Handbook for Young Muslims, Muslim Wedding and Marriage Guide
Imam Jafar as-Sadiq (a.s.) says: When a person intends to send a proposal for marriage, he must pray two Rakat prayers, praise Allah (SWT) and recite the following invocation:
Transliteration: Bismillah hir Rah'maanir Rah'eem.
Allaahumma inni oreedo an atazawwaja faqaddirli minannisaa-e- a-'affahunna farjawn wa ah'faz'ahunna li fi nafseha wa maali wa aw sa-a'-hunna li rizqan wa a'-z'amahunna li barakatan fi nafseha wa maali anna atroko faqaddirli minha waladan t'ayyaban taj-a'lahu khalafan s'aaleh'an fi h'ayaati wa ba'da mauti.
Translation: In the name of Allah the Beneficent, the Merciful.
O Allah! I intend to marry. Therefore destine for me the most chaste of women and one who would, for my sake, guard herself and my property. Who shall be most auspicious for increase in sustenance and bounties. Then from her womb bestow a pure son who would be my sweet reminiscence in my life and after my death.
01. INTRODUCTION:
A. Who needs this book?
This book is compiled for those intending to marry in the near future or the newly married people. In this short Nikaah Handbook we have tried to put things in a nutshell. It is recommended to do a detailed reading of other books on Marriage, references of which are given at the end of this Nikah Handbook.
B. Why do we need to know the rules?
It is the duty of every Muslim to follow the Islamic laws not only in matters of prayers and fasting but also in all his actions. Islam has well defined rules about marriage and sex too. So if you want to follow Islam fully, then you must know the Islamic rules and regulations governing married life. Islam has never repressed the natural feelings of human beings but provides rules, which are divine.
This will not only enable you to be faithful to your religion but would also shield you from the barrage of Sex literature that portrays this natural instinct as one that must be left uncontrolled. Western sexual morality permits many things that are prohibited in Islam. The reason for the prohibition of certain actions is not to act as an infringement of an individual's freedom but because Islam is concerned not only with your physical well being but also your spiritual enhancement. Moreover, we can see the degradation of society where absolute sexual freedom prevails.
C. Main Objective of the Nikah Handbook.
The commencement of a new life takes place through marriage. If Islamic rules are known and followed, the child born will be chaste. Insha Allah, our progeny can then be capable of being the Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and his holy Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) followers.
Imam Jafar as-Sadiq (a.s.) says: When a person intends to send a proposal for marriage, he must pray two Rakat prayers, praise Allah (SWT) and recite the following invocation:
Transliteration: Bismillah hir Rah'maanir Rah'eem.
Allaahumma inni oreedo an atazawwaja faqaddirli minannisaa-e- a-'affahunna farjawn wa ah'faz'ahunna li fi nafseha wa maali wa aw sa-a'-hunna li rizqan wa a'-z'amahunna li barakatan fi nafseha wa maali anna atroko faqaddirli minha waladan t'ayyaban taj-a'lahu khalafan s'aaleh'an fi h'ayaati wa ba'da mauti.
Translation: In the name of Allah the Beneficent, the Merciful.
O Allah! I intend to marry. Therefore destine for me the most chaste of women and one who would, for my sake, guard herself and my property. Who shall be most auspicious for increase in sustenance and bounties. Then from her womb bestow a pure son who would be my sweet reminiscence in my life and after my death.
01. INTRODUCTION:
A. Who needs this book?
This book is compiled for those intending to marry in the near future or the newly married people. In this short Nikaah Handbook we have tried to put things in a nutshell. It is recommended to do a detailed reading of other books on Marriage, references of which are given at the end of this Nikah Handbook.
B. Why do we need to know the rules?
It is the duty of every Muslim to follow the Islamic laws not only in matters of prayers and fasting but also in all his actions. Islam has well defined rules about marriage and sex too. So if you want to follow Islam fully, then you must know the Islamic rules and regulations governing married life. Islam has never repressed the natural feelings of human beings but provides rules, which are divine.
This will not only enable you to be faithful to your religion but would also shield you from the barrage of Sex literature that portrays this natural instinct as one that must be left uncontrolled. Western sexual morality permits many things that are prohibited in Islam. The reason for the prohibition of certain actions is not to act as an infringement of an individual's freedom but because Islam is concerned not only with your physical well being but also your spiritual enhancement. Moreover, we can see the degradation of society where absolute sexual freedom prevails.
C. Main Objective of the Nikah Handbook.
The commencement of a new life takes place through marriage. If Islamic rules are known and followed, the child born will be chaste. Insha Allah, our progeny can then be capable of being the Holy Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) and his holy Ahlul Bayt (a.s.) followers.
Philosophy of marriages of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), Muslim Marriage
Philosophy of marriages of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.), Muslim Marriage
In the early part of eighteenth century, the Christian writers started with new tactics of attacking Islam. They aimed, through publications full of lies and slanders, at diverting attention from the noble framework of Islam and degrading the exalted person of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (May peace be on him and his progeny).
The basis of that adverse propaganda was the books written by Christian writers of the fifteenth century. A writer had written a book under the title 'Refutation to the Religion of Muhammad', which became the source of later writers against Islam. These writers were unacquainted with the real facts about Islam, due to their ignorance of the Arabic language in which Islamic history and holy books were then available.
It is not strange, therefore, to see them writing against the Prophet of Islam, accusing him of lust because he had married a number of wives, whilst other Muslims were restricted to a maximum of four at a time. (They perhaps forgot that the writers of the present Bible have openly accused their own Prophets of having committed adultery!)
Of course, by misinforming their Christian brothers, and slandering the Prophet of Islam, they hoped to cause a set-back in the fast progress of Islam. But these tactics did not succeed much. We find a number of learned and fair-minded Christian writers defending the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) against such slanders, in apologetic language.
Undoubtedly these stories of slanders are totally unacceptable to the Muslims, since part of their faith is to believe in the infallibility (Ismat or Sinless ness) of the Prophets.
But at the same time it is imperative to acquaint the non-Muslims with the true facts.
Verdict of history:
Unbiased historians, both Muslims and Christians, are agreed that the number of marriages contracted by the Prophet of Islam was not as a result of lust or to satisfy the sexual desires. If this had been the case, he would not have married the twice-widowed Khadijah, 40 years old, at the youthful age of 25 when one is full of emotion and sexual urge.
Prophet Mubammad (s.a.w.) lived together with his first (and, at that time, only) wife, Khadijah, happily for 26 years with great mutual affection, despite the fact that young and beautiful girls of Arabia were easily available to him and were keen to be married to the Prophet Muhammad (saw). Not even once, during that period, did the Prophet Muhammad (saw) take another wife. Undoubtedly he would have at least considered another younger wife simultaneously with Khadijah if he ever suffered from lust and fondness of young women, particularly when the country's customs wholly approved unlimited marriages.
Critics Dumbfounded:
Let us look at the life history of the Prophet of Islam. During the prime of his life, he remains satisfied with an aged and twice-widowed wife, and does not even think of another. Then during the last ten years of his life, after passing the age of fifty, in his old age, when he is surrounded by various difficult problems of the newly-born Islamic State, he starts marrying a number of wives.
Ask these Christian writers why this phenomenon?
What logical answer can these critics give to this amazing question?
Was it not a difficult exercise and heavy burden to marry widows and support their orphans? Was it easy for a perfectly dignified man in the person of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) to marry women of different outlook, characters and tribes, including some of much younger age who were still unaware of the full responsibilities of life?
Let us ponder over the reply to these questions as given by a famous western historian, Thomas Carlyle in his book "Heroes and Heroes Worship". He says in effect that contrary to what his enemies accuse him, Muhammad was never lusty and sexualize and that it was a slander only out of prejudice against him and this indeed is a great injustice.
John Devenport says, "and it may then be asked, is it likely that a very sensual man, of a country where polygamy was a common practice, should be contented for five-and-twenty years with one wife, she being fifteen years older than himself".
List of wives of the prophet of Islam:
After the death of his first wife, Khadijah, he married upto twelve wives in the following order:
Sawdah
A'ishah bint Abu Bark Siddiq (first Caliph)
Umm Salamah
Hafsah bint Omer Farooq (second Caliph)
Zaynab bint-Khuzaymah
Zaynab bint-Jahsh
Umm-Habibah (Ramla) bint Abu Sufyan
Maymunah
Zaynab bint-Umais
Juwayriyah
Safiyah
Khawlah bint-Hakim
Let us examine the circumstances and conditions under which these marriages had taken place.
In principle, it can be stated that the marriages were contracted with one or more of the following objectives:
(1) For the sake of caring for the orphans and looking after the poor widows. These were some Muslim women who had earlier enjoyed high dignity in the Arab society. But on the death of their husbands, their status and even faith were in jeopardy, because their tribal chiefs would take them back and compel them to renounce Islam, thus converting them back to polytheism.
For example, Sawdah had migrated to Abyssinia where her husband died, and she became absolutely without helper. It was the time when the Prophet Muhammad (saw) had lost Khadijah, his first wife; so he married Sawdah.
Likewise, Zaynab daughter of Khuzaymah, was an old-aged widow, who after the death of her husband was inflicted with poverty, despite her being amiable and being known as 'Ummul-Masakin' (Mother of the poor). Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her to uphold her dignity and she died of old age only after two years of that marriage.
(2) For the sake of enacting a new law and eradicating injustice by the ignorant tribes. For example, Zaynab bint-Jahsh was the daughter of the Prophet's aunt. She was married, at the recommendation of the Prophet, to Zayd ibn-Harithah, the freed slave and adopted son of the Prophet. This marriage was contracted to eradicate the discrimination against slaves and poor and to emphasize the Islamic equality and brotherhood, as Zaynab was from the family of Abd al-Muttalib, the grandfather of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) and the Chief of Quraysh, whereas Zayd was a slave who was freed by the Prophet Muhammad (saw).
Unfortunately, Zaynab due to her family pride, did not get along well with Zayd despite Prophet's persuasions. The rift between the two culminated into divorce. Meanwhile, the system of adoption of children was expressly forbidden by Allah (SWT). So, when Zayd divorced Zaynab, the Prophet of Islam, at the express command of God, married Zaynab; and, thus, put an end to the then prevalent belief that adopted sons were like real sons and that wives or widows of adopted sons were like daughters-in-laws.
(3) For the sake of freeing prisoners and slaves. For example, 'Juwayriyah' was from a prominent tribe of Banul-Mustalaq. In a war against Islam this tribe was defeated; and Juwayriyah, the daughter of their Chief, was held in captivity. Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her to set an example of protection and good treatment to prisoners of war.
On seeing that the prisoners had become relatives of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) by marriage, the Muslims released all the prisoners of war held by them. According to Ibne Hisham, over one hundred families of Banul-Mustalaq were freed from captivity as a result of this marriage.
(4) For the sake of uniting some prominent Arab tribes who often were at logger heads with each other and to safeguard the internal political status of Islam.
Prophet Muhammad (saw) married A'ishah daughter of Abu Bakr Siddiq (first caliph) from the tribe of Bani Tim, Hafsah daughter of Omar ibn Al-Khattab (second caliph) from the tribe of Adi, Umm-Habibah daughter of Abu Sufyan from the tribe of Umayyah, Safiyah daughter of Huaiy bin Akhtab of the Jewish tribe of Bani an-Nadir, and Maymunah from the tribe of Bani Makhzum.
Umm-Habibah (i.e. Ramla) was daughter of Abu Sufyan of Bani Umayyah who was the bitterest enemy of Prophet Muhammad (saw) and had repeatedly fought against him. She, as a Muslim, was in great distress since she was divorced from her original husband (who had become a Christian in Abyssinia) and her father was a great enemy of Islam.
Seeing her deprived of every help from parent and divorced from husband, Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her in sympathy. This marriage also gave a chance to the people of Bani Umayyah to soften their hearts for Islam.
Safiyah was widowed daughter of Huaiy bin Akhtab, one of the chiefs of Jewish tribe of Bani an-Nadir. When the prisoners of this tribe were released by the Muslims, Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her in order to safeguard her status; and, thus, also linking himself with one of the great Jewish tribes of that time, and paving the way for them to come nearer to Islam.
Maymunah was 51 years of age and from a prominent tribe of Bani Makhzum whom Prophet Muhammad (saw) married in the year 7 after Hijrah.
The above marital history of Prophet Muhammad (saw) clearly shows the noble aim and objectives for which he married a number of wives. It is not difficult to see that none of these marriages was for personal satisfaction of sexual desires as unjustifiably accused by the Christian writers. Also, it is important to remember that all of these marriages, except that with A'ishah bint Abu Bark Siddiq, were contracted with women who were widowed not only once, but often twice or thrice.
In the early part of eighteenth century, the Christian writers started with new tactics of attacking Islam. They aimed, through publications full of lies and slanders, at diverting attention from the noble framework of Islam and degrading the exalted person of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (May peace be on him and his progeny).
The basis of that adverse propaganda was the books written by Christian writers of the fifteenth century. A writer had written a book under the title 'Refutation to the Religion of Muhammad', which became the source of later writers against Islam. These writers were unacquainted with the real facts about Islam, due to their ignorance of the Arabic language in which Islamic history and holy books were then available.
It is not strange, therefore, to see them writing against the Prophet of Islam, accusing him of lust because he had married a number of wives, whilst other Muslims were restricted to a maximum of four at a time. (They perhaps forgot that the writers of the present Bible have openly accused their own Prophets of having committed adultery!)
Of course, by misinforming their Christian brothers, and slandering the Prophet of Islam, they hoped to cause a set-back in the fast progress of Islam. But these tactics did not succeed much. We find a number of learned and fair-minded Christian writers defending the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) against such slanders, in apologetic language.
Undoubtedly these stories of slanders are totally unacceptable to the Muslims, since part of their faith is to believe in the infallibility (Ismat or Sinless ness) of the Prophets.
But at the same time it is imperative to acquaint the non-Muslims with the true facts.
Verdict of history:
Unbiased historians, both Muslims and Christians, are agreed that the number of marriages contracted by the Prophet of Islam was not as a result of lust or to satisfy the sexual desires. If this had been the case, he would not have married the twice-widowed Khadijah, 40 years old, at the youthful age of 25 when one is full of emotion and sexual urge.
Prophet Mubammad (s.a.w.) lived together with his first (and, at that time, only) wife, Khadijah, happily for 26 years with great mutual affection, despite the fact that young and beautiful girls of Arabia were easily available to him and were keen to be married to the Prophet Muhammad (saw). Not even once, during that period, did the Prophet Muhammad (saw) take another wife. Undoubtedly he would have at least considered another younger wife simultaneously with Khadijah if he ever suffered from lust and fondness of young women, particularly when the country's customs wholly approved unlimited marriages.
Critics Dumbfounded:
Let us look at the life history of the Prophet of Islam. During the prime of his life, he remains satisfied with an aged and twice-widowed wife, and does not even think of another. Then during the last ten years of his life, after passing the age of fifty, in his old age, when he is surrounded by various difficult problems of the newly-born Islamic State, he starts marrying a number of wives.
Ask these Christian writers why this phenomenon?
What logical answer can these critics give to this amazing question?
Was it not a difficult exercise and heavy burden to marry widows and support their orphans? Was it easy for a perfectly dignified man in the person of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w.) to marry women of different outlook, characters and tribes, including some of much younger age who were still unaware of the full responsibilities of life?
Let us ponder over the reply to these questions as given by a famous western historian, Thomas Carlyle in his book "Heroes and Heroes Worship". He says in effect that contrary to what his enemies accuse him, Muhammad was never lusty and sexualize and that it was a slander only out of prejudice against him and this indeed is a great injustice.
John Devenport says, "and it may then be asked, is it likely that a very sensual man, of a country where polygamy was a common practice, should be contented for five-and-twenty years with one wife, she being fifteen years older than himself".
List of wives of the prophet of Islam:
After the death of his first wife, Khadijah, he married upto twelve wives in the following order:
Sawdah
A'ishah bint Abu Bark Siddiq (first Caliph)
Umm Salamah
Hafsah bint Omer Farooq (second Caliph)
Zaynab bint-Khuzaymah
Zaynab bint-Jahsh
Umm-Habibah (Ramla) bint Abu Sufyan
Maymunah
Zaynab bint-Umais
Juwayriyah
Safiyah
Khawlah bint-Hakim
Let us examine the circumstances and conditions under which these marriages had taken place.
In principle, it can be stated that the marriages were contracted with one or more of the following objectives:
(1) For the sake of caring for the orphans and looking after the poor widows. These were some Muslim women who had earlier enjoyed high dignity in the Arab society. But on the death of their husbands, their status and even faith were in jeopardy, because their tribal chiefs would take them back and compel them to renounce Islam, thus converting them back to polytheism.
For example, Sawdah had migrated to Abyssinia where her husband died, and she became absolutely without helper. It was the time when the Prophet Muhammad (saw) had lost Khadijah, his first wife; so he married Sawdah.
Likewise, Zaynab daughter of Khuzaymah, was an old-aged widow, who after the death of her husband was inflicted with poverty, despite her being amiable and being known as 'Ummul-Masakin' (Mother of the poor). Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her to uphold her dignity and she died of old age only after two years of that marriage.
(2) For the sake of enacting a new law and eradicating injustice by the ignorant tribes. For example, Zaynab bint-Jahsh was the daughter of the Prophet's aunt. She was married, at the recommendation of the Prophet, to Zayd ibn-Harithah, the freed slave and adopted son of the Prophet. This marriage was contracted to eradicate the discrimination against slaves and poor and to emphasize the Islamic equality and brotherhood, as Zaynab was from the family of Abd al-Muttalib, the grandfather of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) and the Chief of Quraysh, whereas Zayd was a slave who was freed by the Prophet Muhammad (saw).
Unfortunately, Zaynab due to her family pride, did not get along well with Zayd despite Prophet's persuasions. The rift between the two culminated into divorce. Meanwhile, the system of adoption of children was expressly forbidden by Allah (SWT). So, when Zayd divorced Zaynab, the Prophet of Islam, at the express command of God, married Zaynab; and, thus, put an end to the then prevalent belief that adopted sons were like real sons and that wives or widows of adopted sons were like daughters-in-laws.
(3) For the sake of freeing prisoners and slaves. For example, 'Juwayriyah' was from a prominent tribe of Banul-Mustalaq. In a war against Islam this tribe was defeated; and Juwayriyah, the daughter of their Chief, was held in captivity. Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her to set an example of protection and good treatment to prisoners of war.
On seeing that the prisoners had become relatives of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) by marriage, the Muslims released all the prisoners of war held by them. According to Ibne Hisham, over one hundred families of Banul-Mustalaq were freed from captivity as a result of this marriage.
(4) For the sake of uniting some prominent Arab tribes who often were at logger heads with each other and to safeguard the internal political status of Islam.
Prophet Muhammad (saw) married A'ishah daughter of Abu Bakr Siddiq (first caliph) from the tribe of Bani Tim, Hafsah daughter of Omar ibn Al-Khattab (second caliph) from the tribe of Adi, Umm-Habibah daughter of Abu Sufyan from the tribe of Umayyah, Safiyah daughter of Huaiy bin Akhtab of the Jewish tribe of Bani an-Nadir, and Maymunah from the tribe of Bani Makhzum.
Umm-Habibah (i.e. Ramla) was daughter of Abu Sufyan of Bani Umayyah who was the bitterest enemy of Prophet Muhammad (saw) and had repeatedly fought against him. She, as a Muslim, was in great distress since she was divorced from her original husband (who had become a Christian in Abyssinia) and her father was a great enemy of Islam.
Seeing her deprived of every help from parent and divorced from husband, Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her in sympathy. This marriage also gave a chance to the people of Bani Umayyah to soften their hearts for Islam.
Safiyah was widowed daughter of Huaiy bin Akhtab, one of the chiefs of Jewish tribe of Bani an-Nadir. When the prisoners of this tribe were released by the Muslims, Prophet Muhammad (saw) married her in order to safeguard her status; and, thus, also linking himself with one of the great Jewish tribes of that time, and paving the way for them to come nearer to Islam.
Maymunah was 51 years of age and from a prominent tribe of Bani Makhzum whom Prophet Muhammad (saw) married in the year 7 after Hijrah.
The above marital history of Prophet Muhammad (saw) clearly shows the noble aim and objectives for which he married a number of wives. It is not difficult to see that none of these marriages was for personal satisfaction of sexual desires as unjustifiably accused by the Christian writers. Also, it is important to remember that all of these marriages, except that with A'ishah bint Abu Bark Siddiq, were contracted with women who were widowed not only once, but often twice or thrice.
PROPERTIES OF THE BEST WOMEN:
PROPERTIES OF THE BEST WOMEN:
She is content: Such woman is the best one who becomes happy and content when her husband puts a loving glance on her, and when he orders her for something right, she obeys him immediately, and never does any thing against his will. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
She is a great cook and a good administrator: A woman who cooks neat, clean and delicious food for her husband. Allah has provided great food for such nice wife in paradise. In heaven, she will be asked to drink and eat whatever you wish, as this is the reward for the pain and services which you performed for your husband! - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
The best woman among your women is one who cooks delicious food, spends the money justly and does not waste it. Such women are the workers of Allah, and the workers of Allah never get hopeless and regretful! - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She is priceless: A woman doesn't have any price, whether she is good or bad. A good and nice lady can not be measured with money or gold or silver, as she is far more expensive and precious than money or gold. Similarly, a woman with bad character and worst nature can not be compared with sand, as sand is far more higher and good than her. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She is loving, caring and patient: Do not you want me to tell you about those ladies who will enter paradise? A woman who is loving and caring to her husband, and gives births to his children and when he gets angry with her, she instantly says My hand is in your hand like she does not get satisfied until her husband becomes happy with her. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
She is obedient: Lucky and fortunate woman is one who respects her husband and does not give him any pain, hurt or discomfort and does not makes him worried and obeys him in all the right aspects of life. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She does Jehaad: The Jehaad of woman is that she must not lose her patience if she gets hurt from her husband. Her patience is her Jehaad. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
She is content: Such woman is the best one who becomes happy and content when her husband puts a loving glance on her, and when he orders her for something right, she obeys him immediately, and never does any thing against his will. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
She is a great cook and a good administrator: A woman who cooks neat, clean and delicious food for her husband. Allah has provided great food for such nice wife in paradise. In heaven, she will be asked to drink and eat whatever you wish, as this is the reward for the pain and services which you performed for your husband! - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
The best woman among your women is one who cooks delicious food, spends the money justly and does not waste it. Such women are the workers of Allah, and the workers of Allah never get hopeless and regretful! - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She is priceless: A woman doesn't have any price, whether she is good or bad. A good and nice lady can not be measured with money or gold or silver, as she is far more expensive and precious than money or gold. Similarly, a woman with bad character and worst nature can not be compared with sand, as sand is far more higher and good than her. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She is loving, caring and patient: Do not you want me to tell you about those ladies who will enter paradise? A woman who is loving and caring to her husband, and gives births to his children and when he gets angry with her, she instantly says My hand is in your hand like she does not get satisfied until her husband becomes happy with her. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
She is obedient: Lucky and fortunate woman is one who respects her husband and does not give him any pain, hurt or discomfort and does not makes him worried and obeys him in all the right aspects of life. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
She does Jehaad: The Jehaad of woman is that she must not lose her patience if she gets hurt from her husband. Her patience is her Jehaad. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
FATIMA (THE DAUGHTER OF THE PROPHET):
FATIMA (THE DAUGHTER OF THE PROPHET):
Jab Kabhi Ghairat-e-Insaan Ka Sawaal Aata Hai
Bint-e-Zehra Terey Pardey Ka Khayaal Aata Hai
Fatima bint Muhammad is one of the four noblest women in Islamic teachings. This is not just because she is the daughter of the Prophet of Islam or the wife of Imam Ali or the mother of Hasan and Hussain. These relationships are significant in themselves, but Fatima is important to the Muslims in her own right.
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is seen as the perfect model of the values and teachings that were revealed in the holy Qur'an. He was the Last Prophet and the Qur'an was the Final Revelation: no prophet or scripture is to be sent after him. However, the Prophet was a man and so he could not be a complete role model for half of the humanity; therefore, there was a need for a perfect female model of Qur'anic values and teachings. And that role model for women was Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet. This is how Fatima is part of the Prophet; she completes the female dimension of the Prophet's function as a complete role model for humanity.
That is why the Prophet of Islam described Fatima as follows: "The leader of all the ladies of Paradise." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 4, p.819.)
"Fatima is a part of me, and he who makes her angry, makes me angry." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 5, p. 61.)
According to the holy Qur'an (33:33) she is among the infallibles ones in Islam. This status of infallibility comes with being a part of the Prophetic mission: he is the perfect role model for the men whereas she is the perfect role model for women.
Fatima was not only a loving daughter, a loyal wife and a caring mother; she is known in history as a woman of knowledge and wisdom, and she actively stood up for her rights. An excellent example of her social activism can be seen when she was denied her inheritance upon her father's death. Fatima challenged the authorities in power on basis of the Qur'an. She argued that the Qur'an has examples where the children of past prophets inherited their father. Using the Qur'an as her basis, she argued that she should not be denied her right.
Jab Kabhi Ghairat-e-Insaan Ka Sawaal Aata Hai
Bint-e-Zehra Terey Pardey Ka Khayaal Aata Hai
Fatima bint Muhammad is one of the four noblest women in Islamic teachings. This is not just because she is the daughter of the Prophet of Islam or the wife of Imam Ali or the mother of Hasan and Hussain. These relationships are significant in themselves, but Fatima is important to the Muslims in her own right.
Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is seen as the perfect model of the values and teachings that were revealed in the holy Qur'an. He was the Last Prophet and the Qur'an was the Final Revelation: no prophet or scripture is to be sent after him. However, the Prophet was a man and so he could not be a complete role model for half of the humanity; therefore, there was a need for a perfect female model of Qur'anic values and teachings. And that role model for women was Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet. This is how Fatima is part of the Prophet; she completes the female dimension of the Prophet's function as a complete role model for humanity.
That is why the Prophet of Islam described Fatima as follows: "The leader of all the ladies of Paradise." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 4, p.819.)
"Fatima is a part of me, and he who makes her angry, makes me angry." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 5, p. 61.)
According to the holy Qur'an (33:33) she is among the infallibles ones in Islam. This status of infallibility comes with being a part of the Prophetic mission: he is the perfect role model for the men whereas she is the perfect role model for women.
Fatima was not only a loving daughter, a loyal wife and a caring mother; she is known in history as a woman of knowledge and wisdom, and she actively stood up for her rights. An excellent example of her social activism can be seen when she was denied her inheritance upon her father's death. Fatima challenged the authorities in power on basis of the Qur'an. She argued that the Qur'an has examples where the children of past prophets inherited their father. Using the Qur'an as her basis, she argued that she should not be denied her right.
KHADIJA (THE WIFE OF PROPHET MUHAMMAD):
KHADIJA (THE WIFE OF PROPHET MUHAMMAD):
Khadija bint Khuwaylid, the wife of the Prophet, is truly known as a noble lady; she was, in the modern terminology, the First Lady of Islam.
During the Meccan phase of Islam's movement, Khadija was the main pillar of support for Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). She was the first one to declare her faith in Islam. Her declaration of faith was a great testimony of the Prophet's character: a wife knows her husband's outer as well as inner character. By being the first to accept person to accept Islam, Khadija demonstrated that she believed in the truthfulness of Muhammad as the Messenger of God.
The initial years of Islam's mission were very trying; the Prophet faced severe opposition from the people of Mecca. In face of this rejection, Khadija provided the moral support and boasted the morale of the Prophet. According to Muslims historians, he even used to consult and discuss with her the issues related to the Islamic movement.
Khadija whole-heartedly supported the Prophet's cause by placing her wealth at his disposal. Almighty God has praised that by addressing the Prophet: "Did We not find you in need and made your free of need?" (93:8) It was through Khadija's wealth that the Almighty made the Prophet self-sufficient in his financial needs.
Although Khadija came from a very affluent background, she did not shy from sacrificing her wealth for the cause of Islam. Not only that, she even willingly went through the difficulties of three years of social/economic embargo imposed upon Prophet Muhammad and his family, the Banu Hashim. The hardship of these three years eventually resulted in her death.
It is to her credit that the Prophet of Islam did not marry another woman as long as Khadija was alive; she was the only wife who bore children for him. The name of Prophet continued through Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet and Khadija.
Khadija bint Khuwaylid, the wife of the Prophet, is truly known as a noble lady; she was, in the modern terminology, the First Lady of Islam.
During the Meccan phase of Islam's movement, Khadija was the main pillar of support for Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). She was the first one to declare her faith in Islam. Her declaration of faith was a great testimony of the Prophet's character: a wife knows her husband's outer as well as inner character. By being the first to accept person to accept Islam, Khadija demonstrated that she believed in the truthfulness of Muhammad as the Messenger of God.
The initial years of Islam's mission were very trying; the Prophet faced severe opposition from the people of Mecca. In face of this rejection, Khadija provided the moral support and boasted the morale of the Prophet. According to Muslims historians, he even used to consult and discuss with her the issues related to the Islamic movement.
Khadija whole-heartedly supported the Prophet's cause by placing her wealth at his disposal. Almighty God has praised that by addressing the Prophet: "Did We not find you in need and made your free of need?" (93:8) It was through Khadija's wealth that the Almighty made the Prophet self-sufficient in his financial needs.
Although Khadija came from a very affluent background, she did not shy from sacrificing her wealth for the cause of Islam. Not only that, she even willingly went through the difficulties of three years of social/economic embargo imposed upon Prophet Muhammad and his family, the Banu Hashim. The hardship of these three years eventually resulted in her death.
It is to her credit that the Prophet of Islam did not marry another woman as long as Khadija was alive; she was the only wife who bore children for him. The name of Prophet continued through Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet and Khadija.
MARY (MOTHER OF JESUS):
MARY (MOTHER OF JESUS):
Mary is one of the noblest women in Islamic teachings since she was chosen to miraculously give birth to the Prophet Jesus.
When the Angel approached her with the news that she has been chosen as mother of the Prophet who is to be born miraculously without a father, she was perplexed. She said, "When shall I have a boy and no man has yet touched me, nor have I been unchaste?"
The Angel conveyed the answer of God: "It is easy for Me. And We intend to make Jesus a sign to people and a mercy from Us; and this is a matter which has been decreed."
She was alone when the throes of childbirth compelled her to take refuge by the trunk of a palm tree. She was distressed and said, "I wish that I had died before this, and had been a thing quite forgotten!"
Right then, Jesus was born and he called out: "Grieve not, surely your Lord has made a stream to flow beneath you; and shake towards you the trunk of the palm-tree, it will drop on you fresh ripe dates. So eat, drink and refresh the eyes." She was also told: "If you see people, do not worry about their questions. Just say that you have make a vow to that you shall not speak to any person today."
When she came back to his people with Jesus, they said, "O Mary! Surely you have done a strange thing; your parents were not unchaste people!" She pointed towards the baby. They responded, "How can we speak to a child in the cradle?" At that moment, Jesus, by the power of God, started to speak. He said:
"Surely I am the servant of God, He has given me the Book and made me a prophet. He has made me blessed wherever I may be. He has enjoined on me to pray, to give charity so long as I live, and to be dutiful to my mother. He has not made me insolent and unblessed. So peace upon me on the day I was born, on the day I die, and on the day I shall be raised back to life."
This is the story of the Virgin Mary and her son, Jesus, the Prophet and Messenger of God, as mentioned in Chapter 19 of the Qur'an.
Mary is one of the noblest women in Islamic teachings since she was chosen to miraculously give birth to the Prophet Jesus.
When the Angel approached her with the news that she has been chosen as mother of the Prophet who is to be born miraculously without a father, she was perplexed. She said, "When shall I have a boy and no man has yet touched me, nor have I been unchaste?"
The Angel conveyed the answer of God: "It is easy for Me. And We intend to make Jesus a sign to people and a mercy from Us; and this is a matter which has been decreed."
She was alone when the throes of childbirth compelled her to take refuge by the trunk of a palm tree. She was distressed and said, "I wish that I had died before this, and had been a thing quite forgotten!"
Right then, Jesus was born and he called out: "Grieve not, surely your Lord has made a stream to flow beneath you; and shake towards you the trunk of the palm-tree, it will drop on you fresh ripe dates. So eat, drink and refresh the eyes." She was also told: "If you see people, do not worry about their questions. Just say that you have make a vow to that you shall not speak to any person today."
When she came back to his people with Jesus, they said, "O Mary! Surely you have done a strange thing; your parents were not unchaste people!" She pointed towards the baby. They responded, "How can we speak to a child in the cradle?" At that moment, Jesus, by the power of God, started to speak. He said:
"Surely I am the servant of God, He has given me the Book and made me a prophet. He has made me blessed wherever I may be. He has enjoined on me to pray, to give charity so long as I live, and to be dutiful to my mother. He has not made me insolent and unblessed. So peace upon me on the day I was born, on the day I die, and on the day I shall be raised back to life."
This is the story of the Virgin Mary and her son, Jesus, the Prophet and Messenger of God, as mentioned in Chapter 19 of the Qur'an.
ASIYA BINT MUZAHIM (THE PHARAOH'S WIFE):
ASIYA BINT MUZAHIM (THE PHARAOH'S WIFE):
The holy Qur'an has presented Asiya bint Muzahim as one of the best role models for women.
Asiya's greatness is in the fact that although she was the wife of one of the most Powerful, arrogant and tyrant rulers of Egypt, she was able to see and accept the truth in message of Prophet Moses. For her, wealth, beauty or status was not the main criterion of human excellence; she realized that without faith in God, a human being has nothing.
God had chosen her to provide refuge to Moses when he was an infant. When her maids brought the cradle of Moses from the river, she insisted to Pharaoh that she wanted to adopt that infant as a child: The wife of Pharaoh said: "(Here is) joy of the eye, for me and for thee: slay him not. It may be that he will be use to us, or we may adopt him as a son." And they perceived not (what they were doing)! (28:9)
Asiya bint Muzahim had declared her faith in the message of God after witnessing the miracle of Moses in the Court of Pharaoh; and after witnessing the death of another believing, woman under torture. Pharaoh tried to turn her away from the God of Moses and sought her mother's help. But Asiya refused to reject the God of Moses. On Pharaoh's order, she Was tortured to death.
The Qur'an says: "And Allah gives an example for those who believe: the wife of pharaoh. (Remember) when she said, 'My Lord! Build for me a house with Thee in the Paradise, and deliver me from Pharaoh and his deeds; and deliver me from the unjust people.'" (66:11)
In this lady, we see the example of supreme sacrifice: By marrying Pharaoh, Asiya bint Muzahim became the Queen of Egypt, she gained everything that she wanted in this worldly life from the materialistic point of view: the best of clothes, food, palaces, jewels, servants and maids, etc. But she sacrificed all that to be closer to Allah. And that is why we see her included by the Prophet in the list of the four women who attained the level of perfection
The holy Qur'an has presented Asiya bint Muzahim as one of the best role models for women.
Asiya's greatness is in the fact that although she was the wife of one of the most Powerful, arrogant and tyrant rulers of Egypt, she was able to see and accept the truth in message of Prophet Moses. For her, wealth, beauty or status was not the main criterion of human excellence; she realized that without faith in God, a human being has nothing.
God had chosen her to provide refuge to Moses when he was an infant. When her maids brought the cradle of Moses from the river, she insisted to Pharaoh that she wanted to adopt that infant as a child: The wife of Pharaoh said: "(Here is) joy of the eye, for me and for thee: slay him not. It may be that he will be use to us, or we may adopt him as a son." And they perceived not (what they were doing)! (28:9)
Asiya bint Muzahim had declared her faith in the message of God after witnessing the miracle of Moses in the Court of Pharaoh; and after witnessing the death of another believing, woman under torture. Pharaoh tried to turn her away from the God of Moses and sought her mother's help. But Asiya refused to reject the God of Moses. On Pharaoh's order, she Was tortured to death.
The Qur'an says: "And Allah gives an example for those who believe: the wife of pharaoh. (Remember) when she said, 'My Lord! Build for me a house with Thee in the Paradise, and deliver me from Pharaoh and his deeds; and deliver me from the unjust people.'" (66:11)
In this lady, we see the example of supreme sacrifice: By marrying Pharaoh, Asiya bint Muzahim became the Queen of Egypt, she gained everything that she wanted in this worldly life from the materialistic point of view: the best of clothes, food, palaces, jewels, servants and maids, etc. But she sacrificed all that to be closer to Allah. And that is why we see her included by the Prophet in the list of the four women who attained the level of perfection
HAJIRA (MOTHER OF ISHMAEL):
HAJIRA (MOTHER OF ISHMAEL):
Prophet Ibrahim had become over 90 years old and had no child. Sarah, his wife, gave her slave-girl, by name of Hajira, to Ibrahim as a wife. Through Hajira, Almighty God blessed Ibrahim with a son: Ishmael (peace be upon him).
Sarah became jealous of Hajira. Finally, decided to test the patience of Ibrahim by asking him to take Hajira and the infant Ishmael into a desert and leave them there. Ibrahim was guided to that desert area which later became famous as Mecca. Prophet Ibrahim brought Hajira and Ishmael to Mecca and left them as commanded by God.
Whatever provisions Ibrahim had brought for his wife and child finally ran out. The baby Ishmael started crying out of thirst. Hajira set out in search for water. She was standing on the small hill of Safa; she looked towards the hill of Marwah and thought that there was water over there. When she reached Marwah, there was not water; it was just a mirage. She turned facing Safa and thought that there was water over there. She returned to Safa, but there was no water; it was just a mirage.
As mother, desperately looking for water for her child, Hajira ran between the hills of Safa and Marwah seven times. Finally, she saw that a water stream had started at the feet of Ishmael. This miraculous steam is still running on beside the Kaaba, the House of God, and it is known as Zamzam.
God so much loved the spirit of motherhood demonstrated by Hajira - ho ran seven times between the hills of Safa and Marwah in search of water for her child that, He has commanded the Muslim pilgrims to walk between the hills of Safa and Marwah when they go for the pilgrimage.
The ritual of walking between the two hills of Safa and Marwah seven times is an essential part of pilgrimage and it perpetuates the memory of Hajira as a mother.
Prophet Ibrahim had become over 90 years old and had no child. Sarah, his wife, gave her slave-girl, by name of Hajira, to Ibrahim as a wife. Through Hajira, Almighty God blessed Ibrahim with a son: Ishmael (peace be upon him).
Sarah became jealous of Hajira. Finally, decided to test the patience of Ibrahim by asking him to take Hajira and the infant Ishmael into a desert and leave them there. Ibrahim was guided to that desert area which later became famous as Mecca. Prophet Ibrahim brought Hajira and Ishmael to Mecca and left them as commanded by God.
Whatever provisions Ibrahim had brought for his wife and child finally ran out. The baby Ishmael started crying out of thirst. Hajira set out in search for water. She was standing on the small hill of Safa; she looked towards the hill of Marwah and thought that there was water over there. When she reached Marwah, there was not water; it was just a mirage. She turned facing Safa and thought that there was water over there. She returned to Safa, but there was no water; it was just a mirage.
As mother, desperately looking for water for her child, Hajira ran between the hills of Safa and Marwah seven times. Finally, she saw that a water stream had started at the feet of Ishmael. This miraculous steam is still running on beside the Kaaba, the House of God, and it is known as Zamzam.
God so much loved the spirit of motherhood demonstrated by Hajira - ho ran seven times between the hills of Safa and Marwah in search of water for her child that, He has commanded the Muslim pilgrims to walk between the hills of Safa and Marwah when they go for the pilgrimage.
The ritual of walking between the two hills of Safa and Marwah seven times is an essential part of pilgrimage and it perpetuates the memory of Hajira as a mother.
WOMEN'S ROLE IN ISLAM
WOMEN'S ROLE IN ISLAM
The Purpose of Life: Wherever God talks about the human beings (Insaan) or whenever He talks about human soul (Nafs) in the Qur'an, Muslims theologians and scholars have never considered that humanness or the soul as 'male' or 'female'. (See 51:56, 91:1-10; 53:38-39)
The male or female division is only possible when we talk about the physical dimension of humans, not when we talk about the spiritual dimension. And so, from the Islamic perspective, the humanness of woman has never been denied or questioned; nor has there ever been any discussion whether she possesses a soul or not.
Since both are same in their humanness, both have been created for the same purpose: to serve God.
The Virtues in Human Beings: Whenever and wherever Islam has talked about virtues in human beings, it has not differentiated between men and women. Both have the potential to acquire knowledge. Both, men and women, are expected to exhibit the spirit of piety and other good attributes in Islam.
MODESTY & DECENCY (HIGHEST ACHIEVEMENT FOR HUMANITY)
The beauty of a woman:
Is not in the clothes she wears,
the figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair,
or the style she does make up.
The beauty of a woman:
must be seen in her Hijab, and her eyes,
because that is the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman:
is not in a facial mole,
but true beauty in a woman,
is reflected in her soul.
The beauty of woman is in her modesty.
And the real glamour of her is her honesty.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
the passion that she shows.
And the beauty of a woman,
with passing years - only grows!
HOLY QUR'AN PROCLAIMS: O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. ( Soorah-e-Ahzaab, verse 59)
And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss. ( Soorah-e-Noor, verse 31)
Islam does not allow free and unrestricted intermingling of the sexes. The rule of modesty applies to men as well as women.
CORRUPT VS PURE: Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honorable. (Holy Quran 24:26)
A woman's best Jewelry is her Shyness. - Lady Fatima Zehra (sa)
Nice girls are with Hijaab. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)
The Purpose of Life: Wherever God talks about the human beings (Insaan) or whenever He talks about human soul (Nafs) in the Qur'an, Muslims theologians and scholars have never considered that humanness or the soul as 'male' or 'female'. (See 51:56, 91:1-10; 53:38-39)
The male or female division is only possible when we talk about the physical dimension of humans, not when we talk about the spiritual dimension. And so, from the Islamic perspective, the humanness of woman has never been denied or questioned; nor has there ever been any discussion whether she possesses a soul or not.
Since both are same in their humanness, both have been created for the same purpose: to serve God.
The Virtues in Human Beings: Whenever and wherever Islam has talked about virtues in human beings, it has not differentiated between men and women. Both have the potential to acquire knowledge. Both, men and women, are expected to exhibit the spirit of piety and other good attributes in Islam.
MODESTY & DECENCY (HIGHEST ACHIEVEMENT FOR HUMANITY)
The beauty of a woman:
Is not in the clothes she wears,
the figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair,
or the style she does make up.
The beauty of a woman:
must be seen in her Hijab, and her eyes,
because that is the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman:
is not in a facial mole,
but true beauty in a woman,
is reflected in her soul.
The beauty of woman is in her modesty.
And the real glamour of her is her honesty.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
the passion that she shows.
And the beauty of a woman,
with passing years - only grows!
HOLY QUR'AN PROCLAIMS: O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. ( Soorah-e-Ahzaab, verse 59)
And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss. ( Soorah-e-Noor, verse 31)
Islam does not allow free and unrestricted intermingling of the sexes. The rule of modesty applies to men as well as women.
CORRUPT VS PURE: Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honorable. (Holy Quran 24:26)
A woman's best Jewelry is her Shyness. - Lady Fatima Zehra (sa)
Nice girls are with Hijaab. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)
MOTHER (THE FOUNTAIN OF LIFE)
MOTHER (THE FOUNTAIN OF LIFE)
And the paradise is under the feet of your mothers. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)
Islam has greatly emphasized the issue of loving and respecting the parents, the father and the mother. In our infancy and childhood, we needed the protection, love and nurturing of the parents; but when they become old, they need us to protect them and take care of them.
"Your Lord has commanded that you shall not worship (anyone) but Him and to be good to the parents. If either or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) 'Ugh' nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word. And lower for them 'the wings of humility' out of mercy; and pray; 'O my Lord! Have mercy on them as they brought me up (when I was) little.'" (17:23-24)
However, out of the two, the mother has been given greater priority as far as kindness is concerned. Once Hakim bin Hizam came to the Prophet of Islam and asked: "To whom should I be kind?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Only when Hakim asked the fourth time that, "Then to whom?" the Prophet replied, "Your father." This shows that the right of mother upon the children is three times more than the rights of father as far as kindness is concerned.
Imam Ali bin Hussain, the great-grandson of the Prophet, said: "Coming to the rights of relatives, it is the right of your mother that you should appreciate that she carried you [in her womb] as nobody carries anybody, and fed you the fruits of her heart which nobody feeds anybody, and protected you [during pregnancy] with her ears, hands, legs, hair, limbs, [in short] with her whole being, gladly, cheerfully and carefully; suffering patiently all the worries, pains, difficulties and sorrows [of pregnancy], till the hand of God removed you from her and brought you into this world."
"Then she was most happy feeding you, even if she herself had no clothes; giving you milk and water; not caring for her own thirst; keeping you in the shade, even if she had to suffer from the heat of the sun; giving you every comfort with her own hardship; lulling you to sleep while keeping herself awake."
"And [remember that] her womb was your abode, and her lap your refuge, and her breast your feeder, and her whole existence your protection; it was she, not you, who was braving the heat and cold of this world for your safety."
"Therefore, you must remain thankful to her accordingly, and you cannot do so except by the help and assistance from Allah." (The Charter of Right, p.18)
And the paradise is under the feet of your mothers. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)
Islam has greatly emphasized the issue of loving and respecting the parents, the father and the mother. In our infancy and childhood, we needed the protection, love and nurturing of the parents; but when they become old, they need us to protect them and take care of them.
"Your Lord has commanded that you shall not worship (anyone) but Him and to be good to the parents. If either or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) 'Ugh' nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word. And lower for them 'the wings of humility' out of mercy; and pray; 'O my Lord! Have mercy on them as they brought me up (when I was) little.'" (17:23-24)
However, out of the two, the mother has been given greater priority as far as kindness is concerned. Once Hakim bin Hizam came to the Prophet of Islam and asked: "To whom should I be kind?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Only when Hakim asked the fourth time that, "Then to whom?" the Prophet replied, "Your father." This shows that the right of mother upon the children is three times more than the rights of father as far as kindness is concerned.
Imam Ali bin Hussain, the great-grandson of the Prophet, said: "Coming to the rights of relatives, it is the right of your mother that you should appreciate that she carried you [in her womb] as nobody carries anybody, and fed you the fruits of her heart which nobody feeds anybody, and protected you [during pregnancy] with her ears, hands, legs, hair, limbs, [in short] with her whole being, gladly, cheerfully and carefully; suffering patiently all the worries, pains, difficulties and sorrows [of pregnancy], till the hand of God removed you from her and brought you into this world."
"Then she was most happy feeding you, even if she herself had no clothes; giving you milk and water; not caring for her own thirst; keeping you in the shade, even if she had to suffer from the heat of the sun; giving you every comfort with her own hardship; lulling you to sleep while keeping herself awake."
"And [remember that] her womb was your abode, and her lap your refuge, and her breast your feeder, and her whole existence your protection; it was she, not you, who was braving the heat and cold of this world for your safety."
"Therefore, you must remain thankful to her accordingly, and you cannot do so except by the help and assistance from Allah." (The Charter of Right, p.18)
Almighty Allah (SWT) says:
Almighty Allah (SWT) says:
And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, Knowing. (Holy Qur'an 24:32)
And do not marry the idolatresses until they believe, and certainly a believing maid is better than an idolatress woman, even though she should please you; and do not give (believing women) in marriage to idolaters until they believe, and certainly a believing servant is better than an idolater, even though he should please you; these invite to the fire, and Allah invites to the garden and to forgiveness by His will, and makes clear His communications to men, that they may be mindful. (Holy Qur'an 2:221)
O you men! surely We have created you of a male and a female, and made you tribes and families that you may know each other; surely the most honorable of you with Allah is the one among you most careful (of his duty); surely Allah is Knowing, Aware. (Holy Qur'an 49:13)
The Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (saw) said:
If someone of good character and conduct proposes to your daughters, marry them. If you do not, there will be mischief and great corruption on Earth. (Kulayni and Tirmidhi)
Whoever marries a woman for her glory, Allah will not increase his, but will bring him humiliation; whoever marries her for her wealth, Allah will not increase his, but place him in poverty; whoever marries her for ancestral claims, Allah will not increase his, but in meanness; whoever marries a woman for nothing but to cast down his eyes, guard his private parts, and to establish a relationship, Allah will bless him through her and vice versa. (Al-Targhib wa al-Tarhib)
Women were married for four reasons: for their wealth, their status, their beauty and their religion, and that the good Muslims were the ones who married women because of their faith. (Muslim)
Whoever gets married, has safeguarded half of his religion. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
There is no better structure founded in Islam other than marriage. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Whoever chooses to follow my tradition must get married and produce offspring through marriage (and increase the population of Muslims) so that on the day of resurrection I shall confront other Ummah (nations) with the (great) numbers of my Ummah. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The most detestable of the lawful things in Allah eyes is divorce. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The greatest blessing in the world is a pious wife. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Verily, the most perfect amongst believers in faith is he who is the best in manner and the kindest to his wife. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Allah will become angered with a married woman if she fills her eyes with the look of strangers. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A woman should not fast (optional fasts) except with her husband's permission if he is at home (staying with her). - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The words of a husband to his wife, "I truly love you," should never leave her heart. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
If a man helps his spouse in household work, Allah records for him spiritual reward equal to the hair on his body as if he had fasted during days and offered prayers during nights for one full year. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A man said to the Messenger of Allah (saw): I have a wife who welcomes me at the door when I enter the house, and sees me off when I leave. When she sees me grieved, asks me: 'What are you grieved for? If you are anxious about your livelihood, it is guaranteed by other than you: or if you are worried about the hereafter, may Allah increase your worries.' The Messenger of Allah said: "Allah has agents and she is one of them. She will get half a martyr's reward."
The Messenger of Allah was asked, "What rights do our wives have over us?" He replied: "You shall feed her as you feed yourself, clothe her as you clothe yourself; you shall not slap her on the face, nor revile [her], nor leave her [alone] except within the house."
If a woman does not perform her duty as a spouse, she has not done her duty to Allah. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A bad woman does not forgive her husband's mistake and does not accept his apology. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Engage in marriage; because this is the tradition of the Prophet (saw) of Allah. - Imam Ali (as)
Women are like flowers. They should be treated gently, kindly, and with affection. - Imam Ali (as)
Act moderately with women in every instance. Speak to them nicely in order that their deeds become good. - Imam Ali (as)
Whoever is our friend, expresses kindness to his spouse more often. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
May Allah bless a man who creates a good relationship with his wife, because Allah has appointed man to be the guardian of his wife. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
When you love someone, let the person know. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
Whoever marries must respect his wife. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
The best women among your women are those who show appreciation when their husbands bring home something and are not discontented if nothing is brought home. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
Who is lucky man? "Imam Rida (as) stated: The greatest gain for a man is a faithful woman who, when she sees him, becomes happy and protects his property and her own honor in his absence.
Some women are blessings for their husbands who express their love and affection. - Imam Ridha (as)
Get the one who is religious and prosper. (Bukhari) Read the story of Jowaibir and Zalfa
Use free matchmaking service from online Muslim Matrimonial website to find your Muslim Soul Mate or Islamic Life Partner.
And marry those among you who are single and those who are fit among your male slaves and your female slaves; if they are needy, Allah will make them free from want out of His grace; and Allah is Ample-giving, Knowing. (Holy Qur'an 24:32)
And do not marry the idolatresses until they believe, and certainly a believing maid is better than an idolatress woman, even though she should please you; and do not give (believing women) in marriage to idolaters until they believe, and certainly a believing servant is better than an idolater, even though he should please you; these invite to the fire, and Allah invites to the garden and to forgiveness by His will, and makes clear His communications to men, that they may be mindful. (Holy Qur'an 2:221)
O you men! surely We have created you of a male and a female, and made you tribes and families that you may know each other; surely the most honorable of you with Allah is the one among you most careful (of his duty); surely Allah is Knowing, Aware. (Holy Qur'an 49:13)
The Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (saw) said:
If someone of good character and conduct proposes to your daughters, marry them. If you do not, there will be mischief and great corruption on Earth. (Kulayni and Tirmidhi)
Whoever marries a woman for her glory, Allah will not increase his, but will bring him humiliation; whoever marries her for her wealth, Allah will not increase his, but place him in poverty; whoever marries her for ancestral claims, Allah will not increase his, but in meanness; whoever marries a woman for nothing but to cast down his eyes, guard his private parts, and to establish a relationship, Allah will bless him through her and vice versa. (Al-Targhib wa al-Tarhib)
Women were married for four reasons: for their wealth, their status, their beauty and their religion, and that the good Muslims were the ones who married women because of their faith. (Muslim)
Whoever gets married, has safeguarded half of his religion. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
There is no better structure founded in Islam other than marriage. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Whoever chooses to follow my tradition must get married and produce offspring through marriage (and increase the population of Muslims) so that on the day of resurrection I shall confront other Ummah (nations) with the (great) numbers of my Ummah. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The most detestable of the lawful things in Allah eyes is divorce. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The greatest blessing in the world is a pious wife. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Verily, the most perfect amongst believers in faith is he who is the best in manner and the kindest to his wife. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Any woman who dies when her husband is pleased with her will enter Paradise. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Allah will become angered with a married woman if she fills her eyes with the look of strangers. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A woman should not fast (optional fasts) except with her husband's permission if he is at home (staying with her). - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
The words of a husband to his wife, "I truly love you," should never leave her heart. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
If a man helps his spouse in household work, Allah records for him spiritual reward equal to the hair on his body as if he had fasted during days and offered prayers during nights for one full year. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A man said to the Messenger of Allah (saw): I have a wife who welcomes me at the door when I enter the house, and sees me off when I leave. When she sees me grieved, asks me: 'What are you grieved for? If you are anxious about your livelihood, it is guaranteed by other than you: or if you are worried about the hereafter, may Allah increase your worries.' The Messenger of Allah said: "Allah has agents and she is one of them. She will get half a martyr's reward."
The Messenger of Allah was asked, "What rights do our wives have over us?" He replied: "You shall feed her as you feed yourself, clothe her as you clothe yourself; you shall not slap her on the face, nor revile [her], nor leave her [alone] except within the house."
If a woman does not perform her duty as a spouse, she has not done her duty to Allah. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
A bad woman does not forgive her husband's mistake and does not accept his apology. - The Prophet of Islam (saw)
Engage in marriage; because this is the tradition of the Prophet (saw) of Allah. - Imam Ali (as)
Women are like flowers. They should be treated gently, kindly, and with affection. - Imam Ali (as)
Act moderately with women in every instance. Speak to them nicely in order that their deeds become good. - Imam Ali (as)
Whoever is our friend, expresses kindness to his spouse more often. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
May Allah bless a man who creates a good relationship with his wife, because Allah has appointed man to be the guardian of his wife. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
When you love someone, let the person know. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
Whoever marries must respect his wife. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
The best women among your women are those who show appreciation when their husbands bring home something and are not discontented if nothing is brought home. - Imam Ja'far al-Sadiq (as)
Who is lucky man? "Imam Rida (as) stated: The greatest gain for a man is a faithful woman who, when she sees him, becomes happy and protects his property and her own honor in his absence.
Some women are blessings for their husbands who express their love and affection. - Imam Ridha (as)
Get the one who is religious and prosper. (Bukhari) Read the story of Jowaibir and Zalfa
Use free matchmaking service from online Muslim Matrimonial website to find your Muslim Soul Mate or Islamic Life Partner.
Islamic Wife (Muslim Bride) in the light of Holy Qur'an and Ahadees (Prophetic traditions)
Islamic Wife (Muslim Bride) in the light of Holy Qur'an and Ahadees (Prophetic traditions)
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "A thankful tongue, a soft-hearted wife is a friend of yours in religion.'' These are the qualities that Islam desires in a woman who shall nurture the future generations of mankind towards an Islamic society.
Sociologists all over the world are laying more and more stress on the importance of family life, as opposed to what goes on in the West, where 5 out of 10 marriages end in divorce, where 60% of divorced women are prone to suicide, and almost every separated family has a history of a delinquent child.
As a maintainer of woman, the man has been deemed responsible for managing the day-to-day affairs outside the house, striving to earn, a livelihood. Woman has been given complete charge of the house, responsible for rearing the children and managing the home. This division of management is not in any way derogatory to the honor of woman; she is not the man's slave, but his equal. In all its wisdom, Islam has allotted different sets of duties to men and women because of their different physical and mental attributes. Man is physically better suited to rough it out in the harsh world, and, due to her physical and emotional make up, woman is more suitable to manage the house.
A woman is more self-sufficient in household affairs and better shoulders the responsibility of rearing the children. This arrangement guarantees the continuation and the formation of a society complementing religion. This is a great trial and test for man and woman. Very rarely do we find a family like that of Imam Ali (A.S.), which contains a Fatima Zahra (S.A.), Imam Hassan (A.S.), Imam Hussain (A.S.), Zainab (S.A.) and Kulsum (S.A.).
Holy Qur'an states: "They (wives) are an apparel for you, and you are an apparel for them." (2:187)
What the Holy Qur'an is stating is clear - besides covering the body, apparel protects the body from the vagaries of nature, enhancing one's personal beauty. Man and wife should complement each other, and as Imam Ali (A.S.) has said, "Like a dress, a worthy wife will conceal one's fault."
Whether a man or a woman has an ideological or moral weakness, they will hide one another's faults.
Almighty Allah (SWT) has compared man and wife with apparel, because by their unity they cover up their natural shortcomings, and their union protects them from the miseries of living alone.
Imam Jafar Sadiq (A.S.) said, "Be careful of the woman you choose, the woman you will make a partner in your property, religion and secrets. Find a woman who is well behaved and good tempered."
Our Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "The honored woman before Allah (SWT) are those who are obedient to their husbands and remain within the boundaries of their homes."
Although Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) is stressing one of the most important rights a man has over his wife, the present day Muslim wife has been given other rights besides the right to raise her voice against tyranny and cruelty. The garb of hijab, or modest dress, grants the woman her independence, the right to educate herself and to participate in social activity.
The divine psychologist, Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw), told his daughter Bibi Fatima (S.A.), "O Fatima! If a woman worshipped Allah 70,000 years and died disobeying her husband, she would be among the people of Hell."
There are similar sayings, which remind husbands to fulfill their duties towards their wives.
A woman is not a man's slave; she is his equal. In order that the family union be a peaceful and Islamic one, the man's authority is not based on tyranny or fear, but love and mercy, as the Holy Qur'an says: "And made him her spouse, so that he may rest in her."
If there is a family which has its foundations on hatred, tyranny and fear, the family would come crashing down, but in an Islamic family, peace, tranquility and love prevail. After a hard day's toil and labor, a man wants to come home to a cheerful wife who fills his home and life with peace and happiness; not to a house filled with hatred, bickering and nagging.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "There are five things which bring salvation: (1) a worthy wife; (2) a well-behaved son; (3) a well-behaved daughter; (4) a good companion to help for one's daily bread; and (5) friendship with the descendants of Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw).
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) has equated a worthy wife with the friendship of the Aal-e-Rasul (Ahlul Bayt). In this we see that if she is homely and cheerful, the wife is a perfect partner for a man who is committed to build an Islamic family.
According to Imam Musa Kazim (A.S.), the wife is instrumental in the training of children - therefore she is a means of strengthening faith.
Imam Ali (A.S.) said, "[In marriage] the best attributes in women are the worst attributes in men - such as pride, fear, and jealousy. If a woman is proud, she will never yield to anyone other than her husband. If she lacks courage, she will be frightened by any kind of accident. If she is jealous, she will safeguard her husband's property."
A truly Islamic wife is one who considers her husband's income as the best in the whole world, and runs the house within her budget and limits.
Allah, the All-Knowing, has promised many eternal rewards to the wife for her domestic chores. And Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said. "If, while cooking food, tears come out of her eyes due to smoke, Allah will write a reward for her such as the reward of those warriors (in the way of Allah) whose eyes shed tears from the fear of Allah (SWT)."
Thus, we see that if man and woman, who are bound by matrimony, perform their duties and remain within the framework assigned to them by Islam, then family life would be smooth and peaceful. Elahi Ameen.
Use free matchmaking service from online Muslim Matrimonial website to find your Muslim Bride or Islamic Wife.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "A thankful tongue, a soft-hearted wife is a friend of yours in religion.'' These are the qualities that Islam desires in a woman who shall nurture the future generations of mankind towards an Islamic society.
Sociologists all over the world are laying more and more stress on the importance of family life, as opposed to what goes on in the West, where 5 out of 10 marriages end in divorce, where 60% of divorced women are prone to suicide, and almost every separated family has a history of a delinquent child.
As a maintainer of woman, the man has been deemed responsible for managing the day-to-day affairs outside the house, striving to earn, a livelihood. Woman has been given complete charge of the house, responsible for rearing the children and managing the home. This division of management is not in any way derogatory to the honor of woman; she is not the man's slave, but his equal. In all its wisdom, Islam has allotted different sets of duties to men and women because of their different physical and mental attributes. Man is physically better suited to rough it out in the harsh world, and, due to her physical and emotional make up, woman is more suitable to manage the house.
A woman is more self-sufficient in household affairs and better shoulders the responsibility of rearing the children. This arrangement guarantees the continuation and the formation of a society complementing religion. This is a great trial and test for man and woman. Very rarely do we find a family like that of Imam Ali (A.S.), which contains a Fatima Zahra (S.A.), Imam Hassan (A.S.), Imam Hussain (A.S.), Zainab (S.A.) and Kulsum (S.A.).
Holy Qur'an states: "They (wives) are an apparel for you, and you are an apparel for them." (2:187)
What the Holy Qur'an is stating is clear - besides covering the body, apparel protects the body from the vagaries of nature, enhancing one's personal beauty. Man and wife should complement each other, and as Imam Ali (A.S.) has said, "Like a dress, a worthy wife will conceal one's fault."
Whether a man or a woman has an ideological or moral weakness, they will hide one another's faults.
Almighty Allah (SWT) has compared man and wife with apparel, because by their unity they cover up their natural shortcomings, and their union protects them from the miseries of living alone.
Imam Jafar Sadiq (A.S.) said, "Be careful of the woman you choose, the woman you will make a partner in your property, religion and secrets. Find a woman who is well behaved and good tempered."
Our Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "The honored woman before Allah (SWT) are those who are obedient to their husbands and remain within the boundaries of their homes."
Although Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) is stressing one of the most important rights a man has over his wife, the present day Muslim wife has been given other rights besides the right to raise her voice against tyranny and cruelty. The garb of hijab, or modest dress, grants the woman her independence, the right to educate herself and to participate in social activity.
The divine psychologist, Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw), told his daughter Bibi Fatima (S.A.), "O Fatima! If a woman worshipped Allah 70,000 years and died disobeying her husband, she would be among the people of Hell."
There are similar sayings, which remind husbands to fulfill their duties towards their wives.
A woman is not a man's slave; she is his equal. In order that the family union be a peaceful and Islamic one, the man's authority is not based on tyranny or fear, but love and mercy, as the Holy Qur'an says: "And made him her spouse, so that he may rest in her."
If there is a family which has its foundations on hatred, tyranny and fear, the family would come crashing down, but in an Islamic family, peace, tranquility and love prevail. After a hard day's toil and labor, a man wants to come home to a cheerful wife who fills his home and life with peace and happiness; not to a house filled with hatred, bickering and nagging.
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said, "There are five things which bring salvation: (1) a worthy wife; (2) a well-behaved son; (3) a well-behaved daughter; (4) a good companion to help for one's daily bread; and (5) friendship with the descendants of Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw).
Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) has equated a worthy wife with the friendship of the Aal-e-Rasul (Ahlul Bayt). In this we see that if she is homely and cheerful, the wife is a perfect partner for a man who is committed to build an Islamic family.
According to Imam Musa Kazim (A.S.), the wife is instrumental in the training of children - therefore she is a means of strengthening faith.
Imam Ali (A.S.) said, "[In marriage] the best attributes in women are the worst attributes in men - such as pride, fear, and jealousy. If a woman is proud, she will never yield to anyone other than her husband. If she lacks courage, she will be frightened by any kind of accident. If she is jealous, she will safeguard her husband's property."
A truly Islamic wife is one who considers her husband's income as the best in the whole world, and runs the house within her budget and limits.
Allah, the All-Knowing, has promised many eternal rewards to the wife for her domestic chores. And Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw) said. "If, while cooking food, tears come out of her eyes due to smoke, Allah will write a reward for her such as the reward of those warriors (in the way of Allah) whose eyes shed tears from the fear of Allah (SWT)."
Thus, we see that if man and woman, who are bound by matrimony, perform their duties and remain within the framework assigned to them by Islam, then family life would be smooth and peaceful. Elahi Ameen.
Use free matchmaking service from online Muslim Matrimonial website to find your Muslim Bride or Islamic Wife.
Strive to please Allah and Allah Alone, may He be glorified
Strive to please Allah and Allah Alone, may He be glorified. Make pure intentions in all that you do, especially when you are ultimately doing something "just" for your husband, children or household. Know that these are your duties as the Muslim wife, and be thankful that no good deed will ever be overlooked or under-appreciated by our One Beneficent Creator. Do not strive for the temporary conveniences of this life (such as, "Thank you" gifts, or words of praise). Be aware that you can be the greatest joy in his life and worthy of great things in the hereafter. Ameen.
Ponn Sabra MPH, a highly-prolific public health official, turned best-selling author, internet marketer and columnist, now focuses all her time and energy to being a Muslim homeschooling mom. Ponn and her 3 girls created the 1st and largest online community dedicated to American Muslim moms where they share their high-tech, traveling, green tips, tools, contests and more. Come grab some great freebies at http://AmericanMuslimMom.com today!
Ponn Sabra MPH, a highly-prolific public health official, turned best-selling author, internet marketer and columnist, now focuses all her time and energy to being a Muslim homeschooling mom. Ponn and her 3 girls created the 1st and largest online community dedicated to American Muslim moms where they share their high-tech, traveling, green tips, tools, contests and more. Come grab some great freebies at http://AmericanMuslimMom.com today!
Be timely and aware.
Be timely and aware. Organize a schedule tight enough to maintain a healthy routine and regularity to your life; yet flexible enough to allow for surprises and randomness. Know that the dunya (this life on Earth) is very short, and that every positive act is one step closer to the akhira (hereafter), inshaAllah (God willing).
Strive to be the best personal chef you possibly can
Strive to be the best personal chef you possibly can. Be keen to please all his senses, which the beauty of food has the ability to do. Be patient and try to learn how to master the art of offering a refreshing scent to your nose, pleasurable texture to your fingers, appealing display to your eyes, and the peaceful silence to your ears--all in one tasty meal. Remember that this is possible with the least of foods. For example, some of the favorite foods of Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, were milk, olives, olive oil, bread, cucumbers, and dates.
Strive to have your home his chosen place of comfort and leisure.
Strive to have your home his chosen place of comfort and leisure. Cleanliness, organization, brightness and clutter-freedom keep a home happy and fun. A creative woman can find her family's comfort zone and preferences. It is possible to find tones that are naturally colorful and lively yet calming. Beyond the overall pleasing appeal of your home, you need to be refreshing to him close-up too. Allow your bodily fragrances and breathe to always be worth being a cheek apart. Allow him all the reasons to rush home because it is safe, healthy, and peaceful and fun--his getaway from the daily stresses of work, and outside forces. Make a lifetime goal to establish and share all your favorite halal (permissible) past-times together. From fixing cars, cooking exotic meals, playing family board games, reciting Qur'an, learning nasheeds (Islamic songs), and grocery shopping--family time is sacred treasured time. Be your family's Leisure Leader.
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